The Job

Having a job is liberating yet debilitating at the same time.  The first day on the new job has made me realized how little I actually know.  I know now more than ever, that college pumps you up simply to get torn down afterward.  The job description sounds seemingly simple.  Yet ultimately the job is infinitely complex.  Perhaps after a while I will get down the basics and things will go more smoothly, but today I felt like I bombed it.  I showed up late, looked sloppy, and felt like a dunce trying to learn everything.  I was humbled today, and learned that learning never stops, ever.

I am determined to do well at this job, yet the challenges still feel immense.  The worst part is that I have to boss strangers around, over the phone.  I felt dumb trying to boss these guys around when I am sure both of us knew that he knew far more about the subject than I did.  I stumbled over my words, and often forgot exactly what I had to tell them.  Even worse I have to be as efficient as possible to get all the work done that has to be done every day, and boy is there a lot of it.

Yep, this is my life now.

I feel like I understand your average American wage earner a little better than I used too.  Work is blood, sweat, and tears.  It is not fun.  I suppose many may find it fun, but the majority I am sure find it to be absolute misery for 40 hours a week.  Do not get me wrong, I am sure everyone gets a sense of accomplishment from mastering a task and doing it well.  I am sure when I finally grasp what I am doing I will feel the same sense of pride in my work.  However, ultimately I doubt I will ever enjoy this.  I believe most are that way.

Yet I also learned something else.  Jobs are not just about enjoying your work, they are also about enjoying your peers.  I hope to get to know everyone there better.  There are many interesting people there I would like to learn more about.  However the first day I was quite shell shocked and immobilized socially by the sheer complexity of everything I had to do.  Hopefully that will improve, I do not want to appear as socially inept to everyone around me, for obvious reasons.

Jobs like this one make the world go round.  I hope to in some small way make a positive difference in the world.  I know if I do my job well and serve those around me diligently and humbly, then I can make some kind of difference.  Welp, goodbye unemployment, hello job.  I hope we can be friends, otherwise it will be quite a tumultuous relationship.